Fishing Lessons
Not only do anglers have lots of fun fishing, but they're also learning a whole new set of skills that can vastly improve their everyday life.
By Alan Jones
May 1, 2005
Patience
Out of all the people queued up at Starbucks behind some clueless dufus at the front of the line who still can't grasp the subtle nuances between a latte, a cappuccino or a caf' au lait, the angler is NOT the one who wants to jerk him out of line by the scruff of his neck and apply the 'sleeper hold,' as practiced by aging wrestlers in the WWE.
Heck, if you can sit in a boat practically motionless for hours at a time in the cold and rain just on the off chance you might catch a fish, waiting at the Division of Motor Vehicles to renew your license is going to seem like an Indiana Jones movie by comparison.
Ingenuity
How many people do you know who can jury-rig a broken reel with a beer can tab on the fly while fighting a 20-pound pike, then fashion an alternator belt out of panty hose to fix the boat's engine good enough to get home, and then successfully explain to his buddies what he's doing with panty hose in his tackle box? Anglers know there's a direct correlation between how far you're going away from civilization in a boat and the importance of the item you'll invariably forget. If it weren't for the ingenuity of anglers to be able to counteract this, they would spend all their time going back and forth to the boat ramp. Besides, there's nothing like the deep sense of satisfaction you get when you can successfully convert a boat's fishfinder to replace your forgotten portable TV by using a modified Skoal can to create a miniature satellite dish so you don't miss the Daytona 500.
Stealth
Any angler who can successfully fish in an aluminum boat and not make a sound, despite the fact they're using a concrete block with 60 feet of chain attached for an anchoring system, will have no problem slipping into a meeting late and unnoticed while their boss is ranting about employees who don't take their work seriously enough to be on time.
Flying low under the radar is also useful when arriving home at 3 a.m. with your pockets jammed with cash from a hot poker game when you told the spousal unit you had to work late.
Creative Storytelling
If an angler can stretch a four-pound bass ' with repeated accounts of the feat ' to almost being a world record, it wouldn't be much of a challenge to convince an IRS agent during an audit that because the angler's kid's friends are always over at his house day and night, eating and drinking everything in sight, they are, in fact, his dependants. To explain the wad of dollar bills the wife finds in your pocket the next morning after the poker game, you convince her that you're moonlighting in a local production of 'The Full Monty' in order to buy her something really nice for her birthday.
Optimism
Just like the boy who is knee deep in horse manure and is wild with excitement because he knows there's a pony somewhere, the angler shoves off in the pre-dawn darkness in bitter cold conditions because this might be the time when he actually catches a trophy fish.
Only someone truly imbued with a deep sense of optimism can still say, 'This sure beats working,' after knocking loose a hornet's nest into the boat with their rod tip when casting, getting stung dozens of times, starting the boat in a panic and flooring it only to run over a stump and trash the motor, all before noticing that their best friend isn't in the boat to hear what they just said.
Honesty
Whoops ... bad example.
Out of all the people queued up at Starbucks behind some clueless dufus at the front of the line who still can't grasp the subtle nuances between a latte, a cappuccino or a caf' au lait, the angler is NOT the one who wants to jerk him out of line by the scruff of his neck and apply the 'sleeper hold,' as practiced by aging wrestlers in the WWE.
Heck, if you can sit in a boat practically motionless for hours at a time in the cold and rain just on the off chance you might catch a fish, waiting at the Division of Motor Vehicles to renew your license is going to seem like an Indiana Jones movie by comparison.
Ingenuity
How many people do you know who can jury-rig a broken reel with a beer can tab on the fly while fighting a 20-pound pike, then fashion an alternator belt out of panty hose to fix the boat's engine good enough to get home, and then successfully explain to his buddies what he's doing with panty hose in his tackle box? Anglers know there's a direct correlation between how far you're going away from civilization in a boat and the importance of the item you'll invariably forget. If it weren't for the ingenuity of anglers to be able to counteract this, they would spend all their time going back and forth to the boat ramp. Besides, there's nothing like the deep sense of satisfaction you get when you can successfully convert a boat's fishfinder to replace your forgotten portable TV by using a modified Skoal can to create a miniature satellite dish so you don't miss the Daytona 500.
Stealth
Any angler who can successfully fish in an aluminum boat and not make a sound, despite the fact they're using a concrete block with 60 feet of chain attached for an anchoring system, will have no problem slipping into a meeting late and unnoticed while their boss is ranting about employees who don't take their work seriously enough to be on time.
Flying low under the radar is also useful when arriving home at 3 a.m. with your pockets jammed with cash from a hot poker game when you told the spousal unit you had to work late.
Creative Storytelling
If an angler can stretch a four-pound bass ' with repeated accounts of the feat ' to almost being a world record, it wouldn't be much of a challenge to convince an IRS agent during an audit that because the angler's kid's friends are always over at his house day and night, eating and drinking everything in sight, they are, in fact, his dependants. To explain the wad of dollar bills the wife finds in your pocket the next morning after the poker game, you convince her that you're moonlighting in a local production of 'The Full Monty' in order to buy her something really nice for her birthday.
Optimism
Just like the boy who is knee deep in horse manure and is wild with excitement because he knows there's a pony somewhere, the angler shoves off in the pre-dawn darkness in bitter cold conditions because this might be the time when he actually catches a trophy fish.
Only someone truly imbued with a deep sense of optimism can still say, 'This sure beats working,' after knocking loose a hornet's nest into the boat with their rod tip when casting, getting stung dozens of times, starting the boat in a panic and flooring it only to run over a stump and trash the motor, all before noticing that their best friend isn't in the boat to hear what they just said.
Honesty
Whoops ... bad example.
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Fishing Lessons: Not only do anglers have lots of fun fishing, but they're also learning a whole new set of skills that can vastly improve their everyday life.
